What Would Matt Do

Or the Empire Strikes Back, depending upon how you look at it. Either way, it sounds like the big boys are going to team up and try to pump new life into PC Gaming:

Companies with a vested interest in keeping the PC alive as a gaming platform will soon announce a consortium dubbed the PC Gaming Alliance. According to two people familiar with the effort, it will include top industry players such as Intel, Microsoft, Nvidia and Advanced Micro Devices as well as a number of computer companies.

That sounds interesting, if maybe too little too late, but ok, so what are the plans?

The companies are preparing the announcement in advance of next week’s Game Developers Conference in San Francisco. Part of the pitch is that the industry group will keep the PC competitive with game consoles to attract key game developers.

Well that’s…vague. To be fair, this isn’t the real announcement, so we’ll have to wait and see at GDC next week (I have still yet to go to GDC…because I suck). Not that I expect any concrete details, but maybe it’ll be better than Games for Windows which has been total bullshit in terms of doing anything for PC gaming.

The article goes into more detail about how PC Gaming is down 6% in sales this year, but the big hope for PC Gaming are casual games and MMOs. I think it’s horribly interesting to bring up casual gaming while announcing a consortium of companies that want nothing to do with casual gaming on the PC.

Really though, what does any of this mean? Probably nothing. Probably more of the same (a slow, steady decline). Probably a wee bit of hype, no firm details and not much else will really come of it. Maybe I’m just be cynical and all, but what can these companies do to entice developers/publishers to develop for the PC? Short of throwing in money to sweeten the deal, I don’t think much. The console market it bigger, hungrier (a meager title on the console sells hundreds of thousands of copies more than a meager title on the PC), and definitely easier to develop for (only have to hit 3-10 targets, instead of an infinite amount). What can the PC do against that? What can they offer that the console market can’t? Not to mention that a fair number of these companies don’t want to compete directly with the console market anyway because they are driving forces in it.

I predict bluster, some glitz, some talk of saving PC Gaming and not much else.

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What Would Matt Do: I’ll hold out hope…maybe, just maybe, they will help with PC Gaming. But probably not.

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UPDATE 1: Looks like it’s too little too late for one the big boys in PC game development. Well, one of the former big boys:

Epic’s Cliff Bleszinski has said that the studio is focusing on producing console titles for the time being, claiming PC gaming is currently in “disarray”.

Sure, it’s the PC Gaming market that is in disarray, not the fact that UT3 was junk.

If you believe anything the Washington Post or our government tells you, this should make you very afraid:

Intelligence officials who have examined these systems [MMOs] say they’re convinced that the qualities that many computer users find so attractive about virtual worlds — including anonymity, global access and the expanded ability to make financial transfers outside normal channels — have turned them into seedbeds for transnational threats.

Yep, MMOs are the next frontier for terrorist and crazies looking to take over the world (Dear terrorists and crazies, Pinky and The Brain called and they want their shtick back). Except not. If you read the entire article, you’ll find what bothers the government really is that they can’t see exactly what everyone is doing at all times. So yeah, said bad people could be plotting bad things…but really, the big problem is that that big brother can’t see everything. One Jack Dempsey from a nonpartisan group that monitors privacy issues puts it nicely:

“They want to control this technology and make it even easier to tap than it already is,” Dempsey said. “When the government is finished, every new technology becomes a more powerful surveillance tool than the technology before it.”

This is the real fear they are actually expressing:

Intelligence officials said, however, that the spread of virtual worlds has created additional challenges because commercial services do not keep records of communication among avatars. Because of the nature of the systems, the companies also have almost no way of monitoring the creation and use of virtual buildings and training centers, some of them protected by nearly unbreakable passwords.

Now people are creating virtual training centers with “nearly unbreakable passwords”. God, that’s scary shit! What shall we do? Shut all the MMOs down? Make virtual worlds illegal? Make every single line of text uttered in them required by law to be easily monitored by big brother? Hmmm…well, what’s happened so far, to get our the government so worried?

One intelligence official, who spoke on condition of anonymity, said he had no evidence of activity by terrorist cells or widespread organized crime in virtual worlds. There have been numerous instances of fraud, harassment and other virtual crimes. Some computer users have used their avatars to destroy virtual buildings.

Wait a second… We have zero evidence of any terrorist cells, crazies or anyone else doing anything beyond fraud and harassment? Oh wait, virtual buildings were destroyed! Everyone flee!

You know what this is? Fear mongering. This is government officials seeing boogie men in the dark, because they can’t see in. This is bullshit passed off as real worries. And it’s not even a real worry since everything an MMO does can be tracked by specifically tracking what specific people do (at the ISP level, etc) instead of wanting the entire MMO industry to have government hooks so they can monitor everything happening in them. They shouldn’t have those rights on our phones, why should they have it on MMOs?

This is government trying to get people worried so they can get access to yet one more thing they don’t really need to have access to. It’s sad, pathetic and funny all at the same. You know, funny if laws don’t happen to give big brother access. Then it’s just sad.

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What Would Matt Do: Maybe do as Lum suggests, not take Snow Crash quite so seriously.

Own a PS3? Do you like pretending your PS3 is a PC? Do you like games about Devils that May Cry for the fourth time? Then I’ve got the game for you!

Devil May Cry 4 has a brand new feature in it, exclusively for PS3 owners…a 20+ minute install! That’s right, you too can “go make a sandwich and grab a soda” while waiting to play that brand new console game you just bought. Not only that, but:

While the game is loading, you get to watch a really nifty series of screens that completely catch you up on the DMC4 backstory. Think of it as compressing the last three “seasons” into a single info blast, accompanied by some fantastic DMC artwork. It’s great for those new to the series and also a good refresher to serious fans (you can also check out all these screens again later in the Library mode).

That’s right, they added in a slide show for you to watch while you’re waiting for your console game to install. That’s awesome! Well, except for the fact that you can’t skip said slide show, you can’t skip the 20 minute install and so on…but least they aren’t making you switch disks:

Wah! The game takes 20 minutes to install the first time. Wah! Have you ever played a PC game? At least we aren’t making you shuffle multiple discs into a ROM drive, or continuously click “Yes!” on a series of endless Windows dialog boxes. Installing on a console may seem like a weird idea, but there’s a real benefit. Unreal Tournament also has an option to install files onto your PS3; I’ve done it and it makes a great game even better.

Wah is right, you got damn retard. I love that Chris Kramer compares it to a PC install. Yeah, because that’s one of the best parts of a PC game, the install. I’m so glad they brought that over to the consoles. Maybe next we can get driver and directx issues? What a load of shit.

This is just lazy programmers. They could have made it load the first level or two and then had the rest load in the background or even just had a slower load times with an optional install. Instead, we’ve got yet another backsliding by consoles (remember when we didn’t have patches for our console games…).

Really though, where is Sony on this? How did this game get approved for their system with 20+ minute install? What kind of asshat signed off on that? Hopefully the kind that no longer has a job.

Oh, and the PA guys tell me the Bitches love Sanskrit.

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What Would Matt Do: What did Tycho say a bit back? Oh yeah, retard rodeo. That’s basically what this is. People releasing poorly designed software and then defending it with comments of it’s just like the PC. That’s like the world championship of retard rodeos.

Wow… Back when I first covered 4.0, I asked that Hasbro/Wizards not screw it up. I realize that was asking for a lot. After playing Star Wars Saga (Talent trees stolen from WoW, no more rolling for saves, dumbed down lots of things) and seeing what they are saying about 4.0, I haven’t been that enthused…

Then a buddy tells me you can find out exactly what they are doing with 4.0, before it’s even released. I thought that was pretty sweet…then he tells me they are selling two separate books each at $20 a bucks a pop. Not with actual rules or anything. Nothing you’ll be able to use in the game when it finally releases in June. Just preview information. That’s it.

Just so we’re clear here, Hasbro is selling previews of their next system. SELLING IT. WTF?!?! I knew, I fucking knew it. I knew Hasbro was going to screw it up. I knew they were going to nickel and dime us. I knew they were going to milk every penny out of this shit. And even I didn’t foresee them selling got damn preview books. I can’t wait to see what else they charge us for. Maybe they’ll release new rules that requires everyone that wants to play owns all three of the core books, or that to run a game, you have to pay them a fee (like another company tried to do) or maybe sign away your first born. Or maybe even worse, they’ll want you to sign up to a monthly fee to access errata (i.e. - bug fixes), new adventures, character sheets, etc.

Thanks for ruining D&D Hasbro, thanks a fucking lot.

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What Would Matt Do: I guess I’m going to have to stick with 3.5 and White Wolf for now. Oh, and give a hearty fuck you to Wizards of Draining their Customer Base of Every Last Nickel and Dime, er, of the Coast. Sometimes I really hate being right.

Today, ladies and nerds, we’re going to tlak about gaming…mostly 2007, but the state of gaming in general. Why? Because god dammit, we can. And we love to hear ourselves talk. So lets jump right in.

First and foremost, wow. No, not WoW, but wow, the word. That’s what you should be thinking if you’re gamer. Last year alone was stellar. We’ve seen some of the best games ever released on any platform ever. We saw Team Fortress 2 become a reality, and not just a reality, but a damn good one. And it a little Portal thing with that lots of people seemed to love. We had Supreme Commander and an expansion released. We also had, in no particular order, Oblivion, Crackdown, Mass Effect, Rockband, Lord of the Rings MMO, the first WoW expansion, Halo 3, The Witcher, Rainbow Six: Vegas, Bioshock, Zelda:Phantom Hourglass, and Call of Duty 4. What a fucking year.

That’s alone ought to convince we’re living the golden years of gaming. We’re literally seeing the best games ever created and each year they seem to be out done. It’s outrageous, amazing and stunning.

Now that’s not to say it’s all love and gummy bears. We’ve had all kinds of problems too. Like Fox News calling out Mass Effect for what it really is, simulated porn. I for one am glad Fox is watching out for all of us. Game forums, MMO forums in particular, as still something not to be viewed by your average person, but thankfully enough, your average person has no idea they exist and the rest of work hard to avoid them. We’ve still got Jack Thompson, developers having hissy fits, Silicon Knights claiming any all profits Epic made (and boy howdy, they made some profits from Gears) are belong to them and PC Gaming is STILL dying.

But none of those things can put a damper on the level of gaming we’re seeing now. Last week alone I played some Team Fortress 2, The Witcher, Forged Alliance (SC expansion) and Mass Effect. It’s like I’m living in some glorious world where every game I play is just too damn good.

And that’s really the point of this article. Games are no longer better in the past. Yeah, there isn’t an X-Com or Masters of Magic replacement, but what could really replace them anyway? Gaming has officially passed into a new era. Call it the golden age, the new age or just call it gaming as it was meant to be.

Me, I’m going to call it Bliss and continue to be amazed.

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What Would Matt Do: You can’t hear it, but right now I’m making the Homer donut sound. And it’s good.